Christina Aguilera Recalls ‘Guilt’ Of Being A Child Star & ‘Insecure’ In Her ’20s: ‘I Hated Being Super Skinny’
While gracing the cover of ‘Health‘ this month, Christina Aguilera details her “guilt” of being a child star, the “scary feelings” they emit when reminiscing, and being “insecure” in her ’20s due to her “super skinny” figure. The 40-year-old iconic songstress says, “I have this massive trunk of old diaries that I’ve literally kept from the past 20 years of my life. I was able to catch up on them and do some self-reflecting.”
She adds, “It really forced me to be silent and take a look at myself. In some regard, I wasn’t happy with a lot of things, and it’s scary to face those feelings that, under normal circumstances, you don’t have time to face because everyone is going, going, going. That grind is praised, but I think we’re all understanding that having moments to self-reflect and just breathe are crucial. When I’m not working, there’s a heavy amount of guilt that I feel. It’s been embedded in me since I was little — you’re shamed if you don’t want to keep up. As a child [entertainer], you’re all pitted against one another, and other children are all about that grind too. It’s a weird space to grow up in.”
On her past insecurity, Aguilera explains, “I think we all have our good days and our bad days in how we feel about ourselves. Entering this business, I hated being super skinny. Once I turned 21, I started filling out a little bit, and I was loving my new curves. I appreciated having a booty. I’ve always said that women are way more interesting to look at than men! I have a hard time looking at the early pictures of myself because I remember feeling so insecure. I would never want to relive my 20s — you’re so in your own head and finding your confidence. As you age, you stop comparing yourself to other people and start appreciating your own body and owning it.”
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